Hours after the arrest of his religious leader, Nahshon Joaquin Garcia, at the airport of the American city On June 3, hundreds of thousands of parishioners were summoned to the temples to maintain a continuous prayer of day and night.
“People do not know what a man of God is,” said the “brother” who officiated at Mass on Wednesday in the imposing church of East Los Angeles, the Latin Quarter of the city. His words followed sobs and cries agonizing of dozens of women who wore long skirts and covered their hair with veils.
Garcia, who calls himself “the Apostle” and whose church claims to have about 7 million of followers in the world, was arrested along with two women associated with the religious organization.
The California state prosecutor’s office accused Garcia of 26 felonies, including child pornography, sexual abuse against minors, trafficking, and trafficking in persons.
Nahshon Joaquín García, known in his church as “the Apostle”, is accused of rape and extortion, among other crimes.
The scandal has caused the church and many of its followers to defend Garcia’s innocence, but it has also resulted in complaints and allegations in internet forums of people who left the qualifying religious “cult.”
BBC Mundo spoke with a 23-year-old American girl who decided to leave the church two years ago after having suffered psychological trauma, she says.
The testimony that Teresa (fictitious name) shares below remains anonymous for fear of reprisals from her family.
My family has had this religion since the days of my grandparents, so it’s very deep in my roots.
My parents are of Mexican origin but they met in the United States and they got married inside the church.
I was taught to attend at least one of the masses that they organize on a daily basis, but as long as it is better because, according to religion, the servant of God is still alive and we should be thankful for that. I felt I should pray for him because he saved me every morning.
Since age 5 It was compulsory for girls to wear loose dresses or skirts that did not delineate the body and reach the ankles, as religion says that the body is a temple and must be honored and respected.
I grew up with the reference to Samuel, the father of Nahshon and who was the former apostle. I felt very connected to him. I remember feeling like crying because I was so happy to have him in my life. I knew how important it was, because my parents had taught me that he was more important than them.
When I was a child, I felt the urgency to help in the pastor’s house, although in the end I did not because I was not old enough. The church wanted the most delivered and pure women to serve the table when there were special dinners at their residence.
Garcia, aged 50, became the leader of the world Light Church after his father, Samuel, died in 2014.
If I ever heard anything negative about the church, I had to interrupt the person or leave. I thought the devil was using people and felt they were lost in the world.
Growing up, I felt like I was in a different world than the rest of the people. They told us that we were light and that we should not mingle with the darkness, manifested in anyone who was not part of the church.
My parents would not allow me to attend any school activity or let me go to classmates ‘ birthday parties or pajama parties.
The church says that nothing is obligated, but felt a lot of guilt in wanting to wear makeup, dance or listen to music. We were taught that the meat should not retire and that we should fight the urgencies of our body.
At the age of 14 I officially presented myself to the church with a baptismal ceremony and another “revival” to receive the Holy Spirit, because only then would I go to heaven. If I was opposed to it, my parents would feel guilty because my decision would mean that I was not raised well.
“Guilt and shame”
As I saw others weeping in the ceremony, I felt no emotion during my baptism. And that’s when guilt and shame began to invade me.
Three years later, I was terrified of the death of the “apostle” Samuel because we were never told in the church what was going to happen when he died.
My family and I went to Mexico to participate in their funeral honors. I remember praying without stopping on the plane, thinking that if God took away my life was going to be good because I had been baptized and had been a good Christian.
Being in Mexico and days after Samuel’s death, the church revealed that Nahshon would be the next leader.
When I heard his name, I felt no happiness and no relief. He saw how others honored him and rejoiced in tears, while I pretended to weep.
It was impossible to question the things of the church, so I was very cautious when I asked my parents questions, because I didn’t want them to think they lived with the enemy.
I asked them what happened if I didn’t feel anything for Nahshon and they told me to pray louder and ask God with a sincere heart to make me feel love for the leader.
In the meantime, I felt that the devil was using me because I wanted to relate more to people outside the church.
“The Solas”
One of the things that gave me the most shame was feeling sexual desires or attraction to someone.
I had a huge pressure to be a virgin because, if you’re not, you can’t wear a white dress in your wedding and expose yourself to the shame of everyone finding out.
In church rules, if you like someone of the same religion, you should first speak with the pastor and then start three months of appointments and then get married. Some do it at age 14, if they have the permission of their parents.
But if either side does not want to get married, then that person should remain single for the rest of their life and be included in the group of “singles” or “Alone.” The one who did want to do it is also punished and temporarily tested.
I knew I wanted to have sex, but I didn’t want to do it with someone from the church so I didn’t have to marry, so I ended up relating with someone from outside.
My parents found out because they said I looked different. I felt so much guilt that I told them and they asked me to speak with the pastor of my local church.
I bothered to tell her my sex life, but in the end I did and told her I was ashamed.
He told me that they would put me for four months in the group of “alone”, they would take me out of the chorus and that I should go to church every day to ask for forgiveness, because my soul was in danger.
The first week I went to church every morning I felt exhausted. I wondered why I felt so guilty about something that was natural.
I felt humiliated when I lost my virginity because I disappointed my parents and received a punishment.
“I want to leave”
Being punished, I thought I didn’t want to be in church anymore and that’s when I started doing things behind my parents ‘ backs and talking to people from other religions.
I met a Catholic friend who shared my feelings of guilt and shame and she responded by telling me that I felt the same way.
We talked about not agreeing with certain things and that did not make us crazy.
But the teachings of my religion assaulted me and I felt very bad about being having these conversations, to the point that I was suffering from panic attacks.
I started to be afraid to fall asleep because I thought that if I died in my sleep, I would go to hell.
The first time I panicked I thought I would die and my parents took me to the emergency room, but fortunately my heart was healthy. The doctors said maybe caffeine was affecting me, but I felt it was the church.
“It’s a cult”
I confessed to my parents about two years ago that I no longer wanted to attend church. They broke their hearts and began to cry.
I was annoyed with them at first because I felt they conditioned my way of thinking and the way I saw the world.
But then I understood that they have given me everything and that this religion anchors them to some kind of hope of rejoicing in heaven.
Our relationship is not the best and it is complicated because I still live with them. But I am one of the lucky ones who feels that the connection with her family is not completely lost.
I think it is a cult and many have been left alone when deciding to abandon it.
When I learned of the news of Nahshon’s arrest, I was surprised that people approached the authorities to denounce someone with so much power and admired by millions of people.
I’m glad you’re being brave. But I’m worried about attacking ordinary people in the church, especially children. Let’s get them out of this.
I still suffer from psychological trauma and I have sought professional help to manage it.
I knew it was risky to leave the church, but things have improved for me.
